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Postby Ray Blanchard, PhD » Mon Aug 06, 2018 8:10 pm

brittle wrote:time to ammend the "board's history with treating women" op :(


[Intro: 070 Shake]
Fallin', dreamin', talkin' in your sleep
I know you want to cry all night, all night
Plottin', schemin', findin'
Reason to defend all of your violent nights
Promise me you will see

[Chorus: 070 Shake]
Don't you grow up in a hurry, your mom'll be worried, aw
It was all part of the story, even the scary nights
Thank you for all of the glory, you will be remembered, aw
Thank you to all of the heroes of the night (night, night)
They gotta repaint the colors, the lie is wearin' off
Reality is upon us, colors drippin' off
Colors drippin' off

[Verse: Kanye West]
Niggas is savage, niggas is monsters
Niggas is pimps, niggas is players
'Til niggas have daughters, now they precautious
Father, forgive me, I'm scared of the karma
'Cause now I see women as somethin' to nurture
Not somethin' to conquer
I hope she like Nicki, I make her a monster
Not havin' ménages, I'm just bein' silly
I answered the door like Will Smith and Martin
Nigga, do we have a problem?
Matter fact, Marlon, this ain't Meet the Fockers
I'll beat his ass, pray I beat the charges
No, Daddy don't play, not when it come to they daughters
Don't do no yoga, don't do pilates
Just play piano and stick to karate
I pray your body's draped more like mine
And not like your mommy's
Just bein' salty, but niggas is nuts
And I am a nigga, I know what they want
I pray that you don't get it all at once
Curves under your dress, I know it's pervs all on the net
All in the comments, you wanna vomit
That's your baby, you love her to death
Now she cuttin' class and hangin' with friends
You break a glass and say it again
She can't comprehend the danger she in
If you whoop her ass, she move in with him
Then he whoop her ass, you go through it again
But how you the devil rebukin' the sin?
Let's pray we can put this behind us
I swear that these times is the wildest
She got the scars, they serve as reminders
Blood still on her pajamas
But yesterday is dead, yeah, moment of silence
Next, she'll be off to college and then at the altar
'Cause she know that niggas is savage, niggas is monsters
Niggas is pimps, niggas is players, 'til niggas have daughters
Niggas is pimps, niggas is players, 'til niggas have daughters

[Chorus: 070 Shake & Ty Dolla $ign]
Don't you grow up in a hurry, your mom'll be worried, aw
It was all part of the story, even the scary nights
Thank you for all of the glory, you will be remembered, aw
Thank you to all of the heroes of the night (night, night)
They gotta repaint the colors, the lie is wearin' off
Reality is upon us, colors drippin' off
Colors drippin' off

[Outro: Nicki Minaj]
I'm saying it like…
I want a daughter like Nicki, aw, man, I promise
I'ma turn her to a monster, but no ménages
I don't know how you saying it but, let 'em hear this
There is a popular narrative form that could fit desistance or detransition, namely demonic possession + successful exorcism. That needs a more complicated story, however, because there also exist real trans who would be happier with reassignment.
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Postby brittle » Mon Aug 06, 2018 8:42 pm

bunejug wrote:
brittle wrote:time to ammend the "board's history with treating women" op :(


to include norm implying that trans women still retain male habits?

I reeeaaalllly don't want to drag this on, but what happened wasn't a personal attack. we live in a transphobic culture. it’s not a targeted insult to alert someone to their echoing of transphobic sentiments. I've been called out for posting and saying sexist comments in the past. I apologized and continually make a conscious effort to eradicate that conditioning from my thoughts, speech & behavior. I'm still friends with those people who called me out and value that this community has people willing to do that extra work.

no one ever said they wanted norm banished from the board. she's obviously welcome here and the majority of boarders either don't see the problematic doubling-down on transphobic comments or they deliberately choose to not care about it! it's disingenuous to say that people berated her and it's not helpful to making this community a safer & more tolerant space. I doubt that's what boarders like riverchrist care about, though.

many are quick to point to these arguments as power-battles between hostile factions on the board. that's not only misleading, it frames any pushback on intolerant language as petty, calculated and opportunistic. there's not much utility in once again instigating this argument when one party isn't present and I wish people would think twice before neatly wrapping this up as more proof of cruel tone-policing.


I'm 100% sympathetic and on board with this post. Tolerance above all; I didn't mean to stir the pot or point fingers or anything.

It was a cheap, easy joke; and probably tasteless, but there is still something eyebrow raising about how the norm situation fit the historic pathology of the board. I thought it was worth pointing out on case anyone missed it.
Last edited by brittle on Thu Nov 05, 2015 10:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby silverapples » Mon Aug 06, 2018 9:15 pm

thanks for your valuable contributions to the Discourse dude
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 5:51 am

h = humble in that
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Postby Ray Blanchard, PhD » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:39 pm

RaeLynn god made girls

There is a popular narrative form that could fit desistance or detransition, namely demonic possession + successful exorcism. That needs a more complicated story, however, because there also exist real trans who would be happier with reassignment.
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:43 pm

Damn, love to have reasonable posts deleted
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Postby grace cathedral park » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:46 pm

you've echoed the same shit people have said a hundred times now i don't know what you fucking want
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:48 pm

I said: What she sad was bad but she wasn't being malicious, we shouldn't go for the throat so much and that everybody does it so I'm not saying it's the Board Friends that are to blame and that it was bad but she was speaking her feelings without being malicious and we should listen because as we all love to say we don't listen to women very much. We should have just talked about it.
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:48 pm

grace cathedral park wrote:you've echoed the same shit people have said a hundred times now i don't know what you fucking want


Not to have my posts deleted just because it's not incindiary
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Postby grace cathedral park » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:52 pm

Kenny wrote:I said: What she sad was bad but she wasn't being malicious, we shouldn't go for the throat so much and that everybody does it so I'm not saying it's the Board Friends that are to blame and that it was bad but she was speaking her feelings without being malicious and we should listen because as we all love to say we don't listen to women very much. We should have just talked about it.


fuck off, petty.

that's exactly how this all began. people tried to patiently talk to her about their grievances. and then other people tried to patiently talk to her about why those people were offended. and she acted like an asshole about it the entire time.

you're erasing the numerous amounts of hand holding, second chances, and good faith that boarders who were actually hurt by her posts gave her.
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:53 pm

I don't think she acted like an asshole. It's weird how there are different perspectives. I think you're putting that on her. I think she was off base but I think her years of good boarding and being an obvious good person offset a situation where she wasn't being as aware as she could have been.
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:55 pm

Like I'm agreeing with you that she was in the wrong, but you're acting like I'm a piece of shit here because I don't think she was a bad person because of it
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Postby grace cathedral park » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:56 pm

i literally don't know what you want

people fucking ROASTED me over joking about dalen's child. he wasn't even offended by that. and yet i got shit for twenty pages about how fucked up my post was.

and then norm makes a joke, BECAUSE ALL NORM DOES IS JOKES, that actually offended someone and somehow norm is the victim because she doesn't want to apologize?
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Postby grace cathedral park » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:57 pm

i'm not saying she's a bad person or you have to think she's a bad person

i just think you don't need to keep saying how awesome norm is. it's already known. you're delegitimizing the pain that whips experienced by continuing to harp on this bullshit like a month after all of it went down.
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 3:58 pm

I think that was wrong for them to roast you too! All I want is in the post that you fucking deleted because you felt like it

I think the board is less now that she's gone and I think it's bad that we constantly go for the throat. I think we have to be able to coexist with people we disagree with even if they fuck up on occaision because we can sense that they are decent or trying to be decent. She's not an enemy of yours, or probably anybody on this board
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 4:00 pm

I believe I've said plenty of times that I like you, and if I haven't made it clear let me do it now: I think you're a good person. I think the people that made her feel bad enough to quit are good people. That's why I think the whole situation is a bad one
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Postby chad » Tue Aug 07, 2018 4:01 pm

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Postby grace cathedral park » Tue Aug 07, 2018 4:05 pm

i'm sorry for deleting your post.

if i thought norm was a bad person, she would be banned but she's not. she is free to post on this message board as much as anybody else is. it's her prerogative.

i hope she spends her board break thinking about the discussions she has and becomes more sensitive and aware of those things. that is all i ask of her at this point.
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Postby Kenny » Tue Aug 07, 2018 4:06 pm

Hell, I guess that's what I feel too

I know I spend a lot of my time thinking about what my values are and where they could be wrong and how my feelings can affect people. I've fucked up before and I'll fuck up again
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Postby grace cathedral park » Tue Aug 07, 2018 7:03 pm

What is your version of the events?
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Postby silverapples » Wed Aug 08, 2018 1:08 am

Kenny wrote:I think that was wrong for them to roast you too! All I want is in the post that you fucking deleted because you felt like it

I think the board is less now that she's gone and I think it's bad that we constantly go for the throat. I think we have to be able to coexist with people we disagree with even if they fuck up on occaision because we can sense that they are decent or trying to be decent. She's not an enemy of yours, or probably anybody on this board

this isn't "disagree with", it's like, an ontological assault. it's the kind of thing that, when repeatedly confronted with, corrodes and negates one's self-understanding. how can you tell someone they have to be able to live with that? why should anyone have to live with that?
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Postby wendy » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:25 am

Kenny wrote:I don't think she acted like an asshole. It's weird how there are different perspectives. I think you're putting that on her. I think she was off base but I think her years of good boarding and being an obvious good person offset a situation where she wasn't being as aware as she could have been.

i said this once before and the board freaked out because cis white guys resent being told they don't have privileges but you don't get to decide she wasn't being an asshole (nor do i) because you aren't the target (intended or otherwise) of her joke/behavior

people can be assholes without meaning to be

i think a bunch of people have said it was obvious she wasn't intending to be malicious when it started but i mean when someone very reasonably says "this is hurtful for these reasons" and you double down instead of just being like "i'm sorry, i didn't realize" it's uhh pretty unkind

the solution is pretty simple imo. be kind to people. if someone tells you earnestly and in good faith that something is harmful or hurtful and it will take virtually zero effort for you to change your language or behavior in order to make a space more welcoming and accommodating and less alienating and toxic...ummm fuckin make that change??????? be mindful??????????? just try?????? ty <3333
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Postby Kenny » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:28 am

My point in saying I don't *think* she was an asshole was to show the different perspective where he did think she was an asshole, not to argue with finality about whether she was and/or is an asshole, QED

There was also a bit in my deleted post where I said that I get that it was bad she double down but people have a fight or flight instinct and sometimes they choose one or the other. And in her deleted "statment" she talked about her doubling down.

her post is way better than mine and I wish somehow that it was saved in the rest of her posts being deleted
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Postby wendy » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:32 am

my point is that your point is irrelevant because you aren't part of any marginalized group let alone the one impacted/excluded by her behavior/language
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Postby Kenny » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:34 am

I think that's specious as hell. I'm not defending her words (which i agree would take a larger stake in the problem) and have said so multiple times, but her character
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Postby wendy » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:35 am

i don't think her character needs defending. i'm pretty sure not a single person here thinks she's a bad person
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Postby easy » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:36 am

kenny you can stop adding posts to this discussion at any time you'd like
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Postby Kenny » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:37 am

wendy wrote:i don't think her character needs defending. i'm pretty sure not a single person here thinks she's a bad person


Then why are my posts so controversial? My argument is that I wish she hadn't left, and that everybody involved is good
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Postby Kenny » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:37 am

easy wrote:kenny you can stop adding posts to this discussion at any time you'd like


u can 2
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Postby wendy » Wed Aug 08, 2018 11:38 am

Kenny wrote:
wendy wrote:i don't think her character needs defending. i'm pretty sure not a single person here thinks she's a bad person


Then why are my posts so controversial? My argument is that I wish she hadn't left, and that everybody involved is good

your posts are controversial because you continue to post your takes after being repeatedly told they're not needed or even relevant
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