Fruitless attempts at being cool in your childhood

Let's talk Aguachile Alley

Postby shame dawg » Sun Jul 14, 2019 7:34 am

I was also a steadfast corduroy pants fella in high school, Britches were my cord flavor of choice. Also had a corduroy blazer that was inexplicably my favorite piece of clothing for a couple years and yes I would wear it with the britches cord pants baby
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Postby shame dawg » Sun Jul 14, 2019 7:34 am

Christ
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Postby Bjornie » Sun Jul 14, 2019 7:53 am

My grandparents bought me sand art for Christmas in middle school and I thought if I took the small white bag of sand to school everyone would think I was doing cocaine and really cool but someone told on me and I got suspended and got a lecture from the school D.A.R.E. officer
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Postby donna martin » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:01 am

They suspended you for bringing sand to school?

God I hated DARE.
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Postby Eyeball Kid » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:05 am

I remember one DARE class where the lecturing cop told us that x-percentage of people in the classroom would go on to try illegal drugs at some point in their life, to which a bunch of us (myself included) vigorously denied it would be us. Turns out I was wrong!
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Postby Bjornie » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:11 am

donna martin wrote:They suspended you for bringing sand to school?


That’s what I said!! I was all “it’s not really drugs, guys!!” But they still dropped the hammer on me.
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Postby Bjornie » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:12 am

Eyeball Kid wrote:I remember one DARE class where the lecturing cop told us that x-percentage of people in the classroom would go on to try illegal drugs at some point in their life, to which a bunch of us (myself included) vigorously denied it would be us. Turns out I was wrong!


I pretty much knew I wanted to try all of the drugs by 5th grade
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Postby sniplets » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:16 am

Our DARE cop told a story in class about a guy who was driving drunk and ran into a telephone pole. The cop said when he was checking him out afterwards his pupils weren't dilating when he shined his flashlight into his eyes, so he knew "this was a dead man walking." And sure enough he collapsed and died right there.

So for like 3 years everytime I bumped my head or put on a cap that was too tight or whatever I would immediately run to the bathroom and flick the lights on and off while staring into the mirror to make sure I wasn't about to drop dead.

Same cop also forced me to narc on my dad to my mom when I found some gold bond powder on the vanity when I was getting ready for school in their bathroom, thinking that he for sure was blowing rails in there.
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Postby figaro » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:17 am

bernie you devil
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Postby donna martin » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:19 am

Bernie wrote:
donna martin wrote:They suspended you for bringing sand to school?


That’s what I said!! I was all “it’s not really drugs, guys!!” But they still dropped the hammer on me.


I mean, is there a program in US schools more designed to create an army of narcs?
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Postby DasLofGang » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:20 am

grades 3 through 5:

Image

I didn't think it would make me cool but I wanted to do it anyway

all it did was lead to fights where I'd have to get it back
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Postby Grumby » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:25 am

i kinda wanted to start wearing one of those when i was listening to a lot of old psych music. even now
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Postby figaro » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:26 am

being a train conductor will totally get your ass kicked
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Postby Grumby » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:29 am

yeah but your imagined knowledge of trains will get you thru
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Postby The Sunken Place » Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:59 am

Eyeball Kid wrote:I remember one DARE class where the lecturing cop told us that x-percentage of people in the classroom would go on to try illegal drugs at some point in their life, to which a bunch of us (myself included) vigorously denied it would be us. Turns out I was wrong!


They did that at my school too. I remember all of the emphatic "No, I'd never do it!""s like the cries of Peter saying he wouldn't deny Christ. Several years later we were all stoners.

Was it reverse psychology? A psyop? MK Ultra?
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Postby Casimir » Sun Jul 14, 2019 9:08 am

My grade didn’t graduate from DARE because our officer got busted for selling weed. The irony!

Everyone was super bummed because we were all going to get to try the drunk goggles at the next class!
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Postby jack » Sun Jul 14, 2019 9:11 am

Itsmecraig wrote:Briefly considered changing my name to Jack because I thought it was the coolest name


hell yeah
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Postby compatibility mode » Sun Jul 14, 2019 9:46 am

there was a rash of pantsings in elementary school and i tried to participate to be cool. then i got really good and pantsed in the middle of music class and was just standing there in my tighty whities with my jeans around my ankles. that was the end of pantsing for me.
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Postby bugsbunnyseance » Sun Jul 14, 2019 10:53 am

In middle school I thought pirates were really cool... so I had multiple pirate flag t-shirts I'd wear all the time. I was starting to dabble with the idea of being punk/goth, but I wasn't ready to commit so I was like "these have skulls on them and that's close enough."

Also tried to get my friends to call me Beetlejuice.
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Postby important dentist » Sun Jul 14, 2019 11:36 am

thread is reminding me of my super cool middle school outfit that i wore every time we went on a field trip or other big school event:

blue bowling shirt, unbuttoned
OBX t-shirt (procured on vacation) underneath
sand-khaki zip-off cargo pants
off-brand skate shoes
bucket hat from a state park gift shop (again, from a vacation)

there are so many photos of me wearing this outfit at like cedar point, the art museum, our class trip, etc. but i don't think i have any in digital form
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Postby theta » Sun Jul 14, 2019 11:47 am

Image
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Postby theta » Sun Jul 14, 2019 11:49 am

i don't remember what that hat said but it was probably something fucking stupid.
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Postby donna martin » Sun Jul 14, 2019 12:31 pm

when i was 12 clueless had just come out and i tried to recreate cher's plaid skirt look with stuff i had in my closet (subbing in my soccer socks for knee high socks).

my mom saw my outfit and refused to let me leave the house until i changed.

thanks mom.
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Postby alaska » Sun Jul 14, 2019 12:36 pm

i played football at the Private Middle School and still got owned for being fat and gay or whatever. there was this one picture of me on the sidelines standing with my hand on my hip vaguely femme-ly and everyone thought it was very funny. luckily i broke my arm in sixth grade so i didn't have to play in seventh. instead i spent 6 hours a day playing world of warcraft

however this was also the school where none of the other parents talked to my mom in carpool line because her car was too shitty so basically Who Cares
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Postby smartphone » Sun Jul 14, 2019 4:40 pm

i wore one of those silver ball necklaces i.e. jonah hill in the beginning of 21 jump street until the shitty metal made the back of my neck break out
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Postby smartphone » Sun Jul 14, 2019 4:41 pm

also briefly attempted to part my hair down the middle in order to achieve the JTT look even though my hair is curly. it Did Not Work
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Postby joe » Sun Jul 14, 2019 6:33 pm

i bought some levis 'wide-legged' jeans in 1997 or 1998, finally wearing some pants that weren't just whatever the generic target ones were. the first day i wore them, i definitely had the edge of this roast beef moment on my way to middle school:
Image
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Postby Spoilt Victorian Child » Sun Jul 14, 2019 9:51 pm

donna martin wrote:when i was 12 clueless had just come out and i tried to recreate cher's plaid skirt look with stuff i had in my closet (subbing in my soccer socks for knee high socks).

my mom saw my outfit and refused to let me leave the house until i changed.

thanks mom.

It's insane to me that parents don't intervene in these situations more often.
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Postby chimp » Sun Jul 14, 2019 9:56 pm

I did the “gel your hair and spike it straight up at the front”, compounded it because for some reason I put gel only in the part I was trying to spike up which must have looked super weird and terrible. My early teen years were...not great
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Postby chimp » Sun Jul 14, 2019 9:58 pm

Spoilt Victorian Child wrote:
donna martin wrote:when i was 12 clueless had just come out and i tried to recreate cher's plaid skirt look with stuff i had in my closet (subbing in my soccer socks for knee high socks).

my mom saw my outfit and refused to let me leave the house until i changed.

thanks mom.

It's insane to me that parents don't intervene in these situations more often.


My mum would actively suggest to me that I should have highlights in my hair and wear popper tracksuit pants and shit
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